The care and keeping of Dazai Osamu
by Amethyst The Gem
Summary: Akutagawa deals with Dazai's attempts, both during and after his time with the Port Mafia.
1. Prologue

"Dazai-san, what are you doing?"

Akutagawa Ryunosuke, 14 years old, stood above his superior, 16 year old Dazai Osamu, who was currently sitting on the floor of the bathroom, holding a small bottle of hydrogen peroxide.

"Oh, nothing much. Just got a few small scrapes is all." The Mafia executive grabbed a cotton ball and soaked it with the strong-smelling sterilizer. His bandages were littering the floor, exposing cuts and bruises down the length of his arms, some newer than most.

"From a fight?" Akutagawa questioned, watching as Dazai cleaned the wounds with a skill that boasted he had done it before, perhaps too much.

"Not exactly. Tripped over Chuya's motorcycle trying to avoid him throwing a wine bottle at me."

Akutagawa raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. He had come to learn that between the two, there was an odd sort of mutual hate relationship.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go now, executive work and all that." Dazai stood and quickly put away the medical supplies.

* * *

Several hours later, Akutagawa happened across Chuya. "Nakahara-san." He nodded, acknowledging his presence.

"Hey, Akutagawa, could you do me a favor and give this to Dazai? The dumb macarel won't talk to me." Chuya held out a pile of papers.

Akutagawa took the papers, and noted, "Well he told me today you threw a wine bottle at him, so I could see why."

Chuya stared blankly at Akutagawa for a moment, and answered, "I never threw a wine bottle at him."

Akutagawa raised his eyebrows once again. "He was in the bathroom earlier with cuts down his arms. Said his tripped over your motorcycle."

"Ohhh...you don't know yet, do you?" Chuya asked, and laughed a little. "No, that makes sense. Of course he'd keep his own protege in the dark. He's suicidal." Chuya explained, nodding in understanding.

"So then those cuts were..."

"Yeah, probably. Don't know what that idiot managed to do it with, but he definitely didn't trip over my motorcycle."

"I see. Thank you for the information, Nakahara-san." With that, Akutagawa turned to go find Dazai, wondering how on Earth he would deal with having a suicidal superior


	2. Chapter 1

"Dazai-san!"

"Ah, Akutagawa-Kun!" Dazai turned to face the younger boy, and his face fell at the sight of what he was carrying. "Let me guess, paperwork from Chuya?" He took the papers, albeit with a small grimace.

Akutagawa, on the other hand, ignored Dazai's misfortune. "Yes, Nakahara-san gave me those. But he also told me you never tripped over his motorcycle, and he never threw a wine bottle at you. Explain." He demanded, scowling.

"Careful there, Akutagawa-Kun, I'm still your superior." Dazai warned with a dark glare. "You can't just go ordering me about."

Akutagawa tensed slightly, but did not back down. "I do have a right to know." He inisited.

"Well, alright." Dazai sighed, "although I imagine Chuya told you already. I want death."

"So you're suicidal." Akutagawa said bluntly.

"Well, when you put it that way, yes, I suppose." Dazai laughed, but it was not the bright, cheerful laughs he shared with Ango and Odasaku, rather, it was dark and serious.

"You "suppose"?" Akutagawa questioned, "what kind of answer is that? And how could you not even bother to tell me?"

"Calm down, Akutagawa-Kun." Dazai held out his hand in what would be a soothing gesture, although his facial expression was anything but. "I would have told you eventually."

"That's a lie." Akutagawa fumed, "you would have "told" me by your body being cold on the ground!"

"Perhaps." Dazai shrugged, and nonchalantly began to walk away from Akutagawa. "Hmm...cold...now there's an idea..."

"Dazai-san!" Akutagawa called out in exasperation. Not more than an hour after finding out the fact that his superior is suicidal, and he was already having to dissuade any possible attempts.

* * *

"Dazai-san, please, that's four times this week already."

Akutagawa stared down at Dazai, who was once again cleaning out a wound, this time starting at his left shoulder and crossing down to the right side of his chest.

"I know, I know." Dazai brushed off the younger boy with a wave of his hand. "Hand me that package, will you?"

Akutagawa sighed and reached for a bag of cotton pads. "I don't understand, Dazai-san. You're a Port Mafia executive. You have power, status, money, people who fear and respect you. Why would you want to lose that?" Akutagawa couldn't even fathom the notion.

Dazai shrugged, although doing so caused a bout of pain to run through his shoulder. "That's for me to know, and you to find out." He commented, a facade of cheerfulness masking over his face.

"Oh I'll find out alright." Akutagawa grumbled, "most likely from Nakahara-san, if he even knows."

"Chuya? 'Course he knows. Well, most of it anyways. Not all of it. I have to have at least some secrets of my own, right?"

"Oh sure," Akutagawa glared at Dazai, "you'd tell your partner that you so blatantly despise, but not your own subordinate!"

"Well for one, I've known Chuya longer, and two, he's tried to kill me enough that he'd have to be blind not to realize how I feel about it. In fact the first time we met he tried to kill me." Dazai smirked, remembering the moment.

"And let me guess, you told him to go ahead and knock himself out." Akutagawa crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame of the bathroom.

"Close enough, yes." Dazai nodded, finally finishing with the sterilizing. He grabbed a box of all-too-familiar bandages and began to wrap them back into their usual place.

"And why doesn't that surprise me?" Akutagawa muttered, shaking his head. "Dazai-san, what does the boss think of your habits? Surely he has tried to stop you."

"Mori-san?" Dazai laughed, his voice bright but his face dark. "Oh no. In fact he has promised me many a time the day will come that he will finally help me gain what I desire!"

Akutagawa was surprised by two things in Dazai's statement. The first, Dazai's seemingly familiarity with the Port Mafia boss, so much so that he called him by name, and the second, that the boss would actually make such a promise. (Never would have imagined the boss would be willing to let one of his closest men possibly die from suicide.) He thought, then voiced aloud, "but yet he hasn't."

"No, not yet." Dazai slumped a little, glancing wistfully at the empty medicine cabinet. Mori had long since demanded it be emptied, although all it had ever held was pain reducers. "He loves to hold it over my head, too." With that Dazai finished wrapping the bandages, and went about pulling his shirt back on.

"I couldn't imagine why." Akutagawa's comment earned a rebuking look from Dazai, but he ignored it, yet again. "Dazai-san, if nothing else, please don't try four times in one week. I'm sure the boss and Nakahara-san would agree that that is too much."

"Chuya would only say that because it would inconvenience him." Dazai laughed once more, "and the same goes for Mori-san."

"Whatever the case may be, if this continues I may be added to that list." With that Akutagawa left the room, pondering why exactly he had managed to find himself in such a situation.


	3. Chapter 2

"Nakahara-san, why has Dazai-san not managed to succeed?"

Akutagawa was training with Chuya, under Dazai's orders. Currently the younger boy was trying to avoid getting punched by the older one.

"Huh?" Chuya grunted, swinging his fist. "Well now what kind of question is...oh. That kind of succeeding." He laughed, and his face held a glint of amusement. "No-one really knows. Just his luck I guess. Not to mention every other time he tries someone catches him, usually me, or the boss."

"And now me." Akutagawa grumbled, avoiding a deft kick by Chuya.

"Oh, you've only caught him in the act of minor stuff." Chuya smirked, and continued, "I mean literally catching."

Akutagawa's eyes went wide, and he asked with seriousness, "he's done that?"

"Yep. Multiple times. I've often wished my ability could work on him. Would make things so much easier if I could just force him away from it."

"I could see that." Akutagawa continued to spar with the red-headed executive, although he was losing steam a little. "So...why does he even..."

"Even try?" Chuya finished, shrugging. "From what I know, he's tired of everything. I'm sure there's more to the story, knowing him, but that's all I've got. He just doesn't see a point in it all."

"I see..." Akutagawa had figured that the answer would be something along those lines, and wondered what the rest of the reason might be. "Nakahara-san, has he ever..." just then, Akutagawa broke into a fit of coughing, and Chuya, unable to stop himself in time, punched the younger Mafioso with such a force that it sent him to the ground.

"You OK there?" Chuya got down to pull Akutagawa up, and offered a handkerchief as the coughing fit continued.

The ravenette accepted it gratefully, and a moment later it was spattered with drops of blood. "I'm fine..." he mumbled, his breathing slowly becoming more regular and fluid.

"Now, what was that you were going to say?" Chuya questioned, helping Akutagawa to his feet.

"Has Dazai-san ever...asked you to..." finding himself at a loss for words, he trailed off.

Chuya, however, seemed to understand where he was going with the question. "To do the job for him? A couple of times, usually when he was drunk. I've always told him he should do it himself. Do I want to do it? yeah, of course. But not if it will give the jerk what he wants."

"I see." Akutagawa nodded, "And the boss? Dazai-san told me that he has promised to help him some day."

"I wouldn't put it past him, but it's most likely all a bluff, and Dazai probably knows it." Chuya seemed as if he was considering something, then added, "Even if he's not bluffing, it probably won't happen anytime soon. Dazai's too valuable for the Port Mafia to lose, as much as I hate to admit it."

"So in the meantime Dazai-san is simply waiting for that day to come?"

"Pretty much." Chuya confirmed, "although he's essentially chasing after a rainbow. It's gonna keep fading."

"You don't believe he'll manage to succeed?"

"Not by a long shot." Chuya shook his head, "he'd have better chances of getting taken down by an enemy, which he's faced hundreds of, than by his own hand."

"Which is why he goes on dangerous missions so much." Akutagawa concluded, "he hopes one day an enemy will be able to take him down."

"Maybe a little. Although I'll bet he knows it won't happen. There's probably other reasons why he does it, but like I said earlier, no-one really knows why he does anything he does."

"You sure seem to know a lot about him." Akutagawa commented, "So why do you hate him so much?"

Chuya shrugged again, cringing slightly. "Where would I even start? We're complete opposites. He just ticks me off."

Just then, a buzz interrupted the conversation, and Chuya glanced across the room to where he had placed his phone. "Hang on a second." Striding over and picking up the phone, he quickly read the message. "Sorry, but I need to go now."

As Chuya started to leave the room, Akutagawa heard him mutter faintly, "that idiot."

* * *

Dazai-san..."

"I know, I know, I've already heard it from Chuya." Dazai sighed, once again holding the all-too-familiar bottle of sterilizer.

"You have to stop this, Dazai-san!" Akutagawa spoke in a frustrated tone, Rashomon flaring slightly behind him.

"Oh I'll stop, when I-"

"If you say when I'm dead..." Akutagawa interrupted, his ever-present glare growing darker.

"Ah, see, now you're catching on!" Dazai grinned in a fake display of cheerfulness. "I knew it wouldn't take you long."

"You can't keep doing this, Dazai-san!" Akutagawa insisted, looking down at the Port Mafia executive.

"Why not?" Dazai tilted his head, holding a finger to his cheek.

"Because! You passed out from blood loss! You're lucky Gin found you!"

"Lucky?" Dazai scoffed, "if she hadn't have found me I might have succeeded. And why she chose to tell Chuya of all people, I'll never understand."

"Maybe because you stole his knife?" Akutagawa muttered, exasperated. "Dazai-san, the boss may tolerate your behavior, Nakahara-san may even tolerate your behavior, but I don't know how long I will. So please, for the sake of both of us, stop trying to die."

"That's a tall order, Akutagawa-Kun." Dazai finished cleaning the wounds from Chuya's knife, and a frown crossed his face. "Oh dear...I left my bandages on the counter..." He glanced up at Akutagawa, a childish gleam in his eyes.

"...this is the last time. Next time you can do it yourself, Dazai-san." Akutagawa sighed and reached for the box of bandages.

"Now now, is that any way to talk to your superior?" Dazai scolded, holding out his hand for the package.

Akutagawa tossed it to the older boy, turning on his heel after doing so. "Perhaps not, Dazai-san, but is the way you're acting the proper way to treat your subordinate?"

Without waiting for a response, Akutagawa left, not seeing the surprised expression on Dazai's face, and not caring much about it anyways.

* * *

A/N: I managed to make this chapter a little longer (and I'm hoping I'll be able to do so for future chapters as well). I'm still trying to come up with a chapter name, if anyone reading this has an idea for one, feel free to let me know!


	4. Chapter 3

"Oi, Akutagawa, have you seen Dazai?" Chuya flagged Akutagawa down from across the hallway with a wave of his hand.

"No, not since yesterday." 15-year-old Akutagawa frowned, crossing his arms. "Where is he supposed to be?"

"Well, right now he's supposed to be..." Chuya pulled out his phone and glanced at a schedule he had written down, "Taking care of administrative work. That slacker has put it off for days already."

Before Akutagawa could respond, a lower ranking member came up, with a nervous expression on his face. "Nakahara-san? We...we found him."

Chuya nodded in response, and commanded, "Show me."

* * *

"Dazai-san, get away from there." Akutagawa took a step forward, keeping an eye on his superior.

"Ah, Akutagawa-Kun. I didn't think you would come." Dazai turned to his subordinate, no emotion showing on his face.

The two were on the roof of the main Mafia building, Dazai currently standing very close to the edge.

"Dazai-san, get away from there." Akutagawa repeated monotonously, taking another step.

"Why should I?" Dazai's tone was light, but his eyes were challenging, almost daring Akutagawa to make him listen.

"Because as my superior, you have a duty to stay alive and make sure I'm trained." Akutagawa responded, taking the unspoken dare.

"Oh please," Dazai laughed, taking a backwards step closer to the edge, "I have no such obligation. Anyone else can easily take that over."

"Then you have a duty to the boss as an executive of the Port Mafia." The younger teen slowly moved forward once again, wary about how close Dazai was getting to the edge.

"Spots can be filled." Dazai waved his hand dismissively, taking a glance over his shoulder. There wasn't much distance left.

"No, not yours." Akutagawa shifted uneasily on his feet, watching for any sign that Dazai could be preparing to take a final step back.

A breeze began to blow, and Dazai closed his eyes. "Ah, don't you feel that, Akutagawa-kun? _this_ is what I long for." With that, Dazai leaned backwards, an oddly melancholy expression crossing his face.

"Dazai-san!" Akutagawa lurched forward desperately, reaching out towards the brunette executive.

Then, in an instant, there was a flash of red, and a high-pitched scream. Dazai opened his eyes in shock, only to be slammed into, forced roughly onto the ground in a tumbling mess of arms and legs.

"Oi! Don't you ever make me do something that dangerous again, Dazai!" From amidst the two-man pileup, the scowling face of Nakahara Chuya could be seen, as he pushed away forcefully from his partner.

"Chuya..." Dazai sighed, putting a hand against the side of his head, which was throbbing painfully from where it had struck the ground.

"Save it." Chuya pulled on Dazai's shoulder, forcing him to sit upright. "If you don't get down to your office right now, I will personally drag you down there, tie you to your chair, and make you do your work!"

"But Chuya..."

"No buts! And you are never, and I do mean never, pulling a stunt like this again!"

Dazai grinned, a sly, conniving sort of grin. "And if I say no?"

"Then I will make sure you are shadowed so you won't have the chance to even try!" Chuya huffed in frustration, crossing his arms over his small frame.

"Oh come now, Chuya, that's a bit much!"

Akutagawa watched the two fight, until finally Chuya threw his hands in the air and yelled, "Ah, do whatever you want! See if I care, ya dumb macarel!" He stomped away, muttering under his breath.

"Such a spoilsport, Chuya!" Dazai called after Chuya's retreating form.

"Dazai-san, please, stop doing this."Akutagawa frowned, while his mentor sprang to his feet as if he had not just been knocked over harshly.

"Nope! Not until I'm-"

"I know, I know." Akutagawa cut off Dazai's sentence, "You dont have to say it."

"Good. I hate repeating things needlessly." Dazai's former facade of cheerfulness faded, and there was a dark glint in his eyes.

"Yet you say it nearly every day." Akutagawa pointed out, ignoring the shift in his superior's demeanor.

"Well, yes, but that is because I want to!" Just like that, Dazai was once again his bright, sociable persona. "There is a differnce you know."

"I know." Akutagawa spoke bluntly, turning to go down the stairway into the building. Thinking better of it, he glanced over his shoulder, and to his dismay, Dazai was already staring longingly towards the edge.

"Don't even think about it..."


End file.
